I Woke Up In Sh*t!!!

Now seriously guys! “Motherhood” has hit the Next Bloody Level! 

Yes! You read that correctly! I literally slept in shit! and to make matters worse it wasn’t even my own sh*t. I was gifted with a shitty pillow by ONE of the Rosebuds kids! 

Now I suppose your wondering how this happened right? Well basically at some point while I was out last night (having dinner with friends) someone did a poo… Now my children like to poo and say nothing until you smell it or it’s a visible accident so Im assuming it went something like this….. 

  • Belly grumbling…
  • Bit of a strain.. 
  • Warm, stinking, nappy.. 
  • Idea::”let’s jump and slide on Mummys bed👍”
  • Oops there’s poop on my thigh! yuk!💩
  • “Daddy, Daddy! I poo poo!…”

Then muggings here gets in at 3am after an epic night and I’m exhausted. Plump up the bloody shitty pillow and lay my head to sleep. None the wiser!

Now it’s already done and dusted and I’m sure it was an accident  (I hope….) but the worst thing is I can’t actually be 100% sure who did it! There’s a 50/50 chance out of the 2 boys as they both still require support cleaning their bottoms. But I’m sorry; within 9 years of motherhood I have NEVER slept, in or on top of sh*t until last night. This is truly a new and gross experience that I’m guessing shows motherhood in true fashion! 

“Long gone are the days of sh*t smeared walls and toilet bowls….. I mean, clearly one of my kids is a mastermind, thinks he’s Picasso and has upgraded his skills to sh*t smearing on my flipping pillow!!!!”

I know I joke about this, but what else can I do aye? Kids are honestly full of surprises!. Anyway, Im off to go wash my face…..hair, infact I might go swim in some disinfectant……

Tell me!…..What are some of the most outrageous things your kids have done? Please, humor me a little so I don’t feel I’m the only one to endure this foolishness! 

Hope you enjoyed! Don’t forget to like, comment and of course follow. x

14 Comments Add yours

  1. Bulgarian in London says:

    Wow, I laughed out loud. Amazing. πŸ˜€ Poor you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lmao πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚. Thanks for reading hun xx

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Esther says:

    I don’t understand, but sorry mum. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‡must be Shit. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
    Noticed what I did there?
    You’ll laugh at these memories later. Good you’re writing this, so when they grow up they don’t begin to deny😁


    1. lmao!!!! it pretty much went something like that and now some time has passed it is soo funny! thanks for checking us out xx

      Liked by 1 person

  3. mliae says:

    Poor you, I would’ve flipped out completely

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lmao πŸ˜‚ it was far too late! Whichever rugrat did it wouldn’t even remember to know what I’m flipping out about. But it’s defo a story for the books! I intend on reminding them when they have girlfriend’s. I will get revenge one day!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. mliae says:

        Oh yea, you should definitely hold on to this one for a future extortion moment! Wont get much better than that πŸ˜‰


      2. Tell me about it. Might remind them every birthday and Xmas too lmao 😂

        Liked by 1 person

      3. mliae says:

        You should!


  4. Oh poor you and I freaked out when I thought the bird shit or puked on my bed Thursday when it’s poor leg was all knotted up in it’s hut. I probably would have lost it had I woke up in someone else poop all over. My kids done something a while back that just made me want to boil my own tongue to get it clean. Maybe if I hadn’t been up the last 24 hours I could think of it. But it was one of the moments.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lmao πŸ˜‚ see I know it’s not the same and I suppose I shouldn’t laugh because at the time it’s never that funny but it’s kinda warming to know I’m not the only mum who has these bizarre experiences. X

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Barbara says:

    Yes, that’s a bit rough. Still soon sorted out with a batch of laundry. Hopefully it will never happen again.


    1. Lol I truly hope so! At least I can’t say the never give me anything I guess! A great story to tell when they are older lol x


  6. That’s so funny!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s